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The question of the night at Bethel A.M.E. Church on Tuesday during Zeta Phi Beta Sorority Inc. Rho Omega Chapter's Bridging the Gap discussion panel was, "How do we mobilize all generations to action?"
A community of organizers, activists, professionals and residents gathered to try and find the solution. Ultimately, many agreed that the answers lay in leadership, empathy and education.
The discussion started with the panelists identifying the biggest misconceptions about their generation and how they create a divide.
Delores Quintyne is an Amityville citizen and member of the Silent Generation, but is anything but silent. She's been a community activist on Long Island for decades, and believes the biggest misconception labeled on people of her generation is that they are stuck in the past, don't know anything and don't know how to move forward.
"Maybe we did shuffle along, maybe we did say 'yes sir, no sir,' but we opened that door," said Quintyne. "Somebody had to open the door; somebody had to walk that path so that you could come in."
Amityville resident and Diversity & Inclusion Project Manager at Northwell Health Andrea De Loney claimed that people see her generation as too cocky for their own good.
"There is a misconception that millennials think they know it all because we're confident in what we do know," said De Loney. "I think that confidence gets misinterpreted as arrogance or being a know-it-all."
Chief Leadership Minister of RT Consulting Rahshib Thomas represented Generation X and he said there's a misunderstanding that Gen X'ers don't honor the people that came before them.
To get past the misconceptions and unify, Thomas stressed the importance of empathy and that we have to, "Treat people the way they want to be treated."
Lamont Wilson is the executive director of the Concerned Citizens of Deer Park and he said when you fail to understand, empathize and get to know your community, the neighborhood as a whole can deteriorate.
"This is how ghettos are created, because you're not paying attention," said Wilson. "What you do inside your house is your business. What you do outside you make everybody's business."
Panelists and audience members continued to acknowledge that empathy and understanding are skills that are needed, especially in a leader.
"Everything starts with the leader and it's not just bossing people around; it's also the vulnerability of a leader." said Panelist and Millennial Andrew Ayodeji who is the co-founder and vice president of Minority Millennials. Ayodeji also founded Bolden Mack Basketball Inc., a basketball league where he mentors the youth in his hometown Amityville.
"I feel like there was a lack of representation, especially Black male figures for my generation," said Ayodeji. "That's why he felt obligated to lead by example."
Quintyne explained how a decline in leadership during the Civil Rights Movement was a huge blow.
Panelist, Copiague resident and Bethel A.M.E. Rev. Dr. Keith Hayward preached that when leaders are in place, followers have to be willing to listen and be educated by more seasoned generations on who came before them and what they did, which is more than just the limited amount of Black history taught in school.
"I think a key thing is to be teachable," said Hayward. "There's some things that your parents or the next generation has experience that you forget that they have. I don't want to see us get so technological that we throw our foundation, roots and teaching away."
When that education doesn't take place, it could lead to an identity crises. Chief Diversity Officer at Nassau Community College and Glen Cove resident Pastor Craig J. Wright said that when we wrestle with an identity crises, it becomes difficult to lift others up and pursue and type of work for the greater good of your community.
"I feel like the struggle right now is moreso with identity," affirmed Ayodeji. "I feel like people really aren't taking the struggle and trying to propel themselves and get out of it. People are kind of taking the struggle and using it as a badge of honor."
This is one of the struggles society, especially millennials, face with the technological twist of social media.
"We have a unique situation in society where we're compounded by problems of the past we've yet to solve, but then we have new problems as we grow into the digital age," said Moderator Daniel Lloyd, who is a millennial and the president and co-founder of Minority Millennials. "Technological advancements have brought problems we've never seen before in human history."
This challenge seems to hit younger generations even harder as Pew Research reported that 88 percent of people ages 18 to 29 use at least one social media site. The numbers understandably drop as the age increases. For people ages 30 to 49, it goes down by 10 percent, for people ages 50 to 64 it's down 24 percent. For people 65 and older, it goes down by 51 percent.
"We need to get our youth at the forefront," said Judith Montauban, who is a Public Health Educator, community organizer and moderator for Black Long Island. "We need to have our young adults here in the room listening to what matters to them."
In the church, there were less younger adults and children, so attendees wondered, "What will it take to get them in the door?"
De Loney pointed out that it's important that when talking to her generation, and everyone in general, to explain why it's important to mobilize and take action in the community and not just give commands.
"Once you start really breaking down for folks, so they understand how certain things impact their life and their family it really makes the task at hand that much easier," said De Loney.
Dominique Stewart from West Babylon was one of the few millennials present during the meeting. He came to support his fellow Phi Beta Sigma Inc. Fraternity brothers who helped organize the event and left realizing the importance of having community conversations on a regular basis.
"It's a good time for us to all get together and talk about what's going on with society today," said Stewart. "It should happen more often."
At the end of the discussion, next steps were shared on how to move forward by participating in town hall meetings, paying attention to physical and mental health and knowing how and when to vote.
The session closed out with a challenge, which was to find one common goal the community could tackle collectively.
"We're going to pick up the pieces and move forward," said Qunityne. "I think if we all pull it together we'll see we were always together as one."